Friday, February 29, 2008

here's an idea

How about all those crazy-rich celebrities and athletes stop buying hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of gifts for each other...and start donating that money to more worthwhile causes? Like kids who need shoes or mosquito nets. Or maybe schools or inner-city clinics that need supplies. Or the planet that needs more trees, cleaner air and water (support a kid who wants to be a scientist and solve these problems but can't afford to). Or, hey, what about the great "elect Barack Obama" fund? Any one of these sounds more appealing than some of the crap I've read recently. To explain this little rant, I will have to admit that I look at People.com every single day. It's one of the things that I loathe most about myself, but I just have to check the headlines. It's a habit. Anyway, I guess Chris Brown (some 18-year-old who is famous for doing God knows what) and Rihanna (the Umbrella chick) are dating. For her birthday, he bought her 100,000 bucks worth of jewelry. Um, she's 20. He's 18. Aren't they supposed to be making mix tapes and giving each other sweaters from American Eagle or something? Hilary Duff's boyfriend (some hockey player) bought her a Maserati or some equally ridiculous sports car for her birthday. It's insane.

I'm not saying that they shouldn't be allowed to spend their money however they please. They have the right to buy whatever they want...just like I can't stop someone who's on food stamps from buying a PSP or some other toy. (I guess the great chasm between the super-rich and the poor, heck, the gap between the rich and the normal, is the real issue.) What I'm saying is that this is ridiculous. It's so ridiculous that it's ridonkulous. I think it's great that a whole boatload of celebrities gave a million dollars each to Hurricane Katrina relief. That's great. But when you make 15 million dollars for a movie, one million doesn't really sound so generous. I know that's not entirely fair. But, really, life isn't fair. The people who lost everything they had...that wasn't fair either. I really can't think of a lot of situations in life that qualify as fair. It's just reality.

Anyway, I don't even know why I'm complaining about this because there are a lot of celebrities that do a lot of great things that they don't have to do. There are good people who do good things all around the world. There are just a lot of immature, selfish, attention hogs out there, too. And they make me puke. I'm done. I'm going to steam some carrots for the munchkin.

FIVE SENSES FRIDAY:

Sight: the forecast that says it will be 60 degrees Sunday
Sound: "Rami, you're in."
Smell: onions and peppers hitting a hot pan
Touch: S snuggles
Taste: hot chocolate, havarti and apples

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

another ringing endorsement

Looks like Senator Obama has gotten another endorsement. Forget endorsements from big political figures, we're going for the real deal now. Greg Oden says Barack is his man. Oddly enough, that probably means a lot more to a lot of young voters than Ted Kennedy's or John Kerry's endorsements.

Know what? I'll take it. Bring on the celebrity endorsements. Do I qualify as a celebrity? I have something like ten loyal readers. I say it counts, and I hereby announce my official endorsement of Senator Barack Obama for president. Now it's nice and official.

green day

Not Green Day- green day. Not like Dookie or American Idiot Green Day. Just a green day. For blogging at least. I suppose it really hasn't been that green of a day around here. However, I wanted to give a little update on the greening of the P household.

We're waiting until we move to order the electric mower as we don't want to pay to move it, and we don't want to bother anyone with the delivery of a big electric mower in a box. But, that one is squarely on the agenda. We've also found solar lights like we wanted for our driveway and our storage shed...if only we had a driveway and a storage shed. Those are right at the top of the to-do list, too. We'll likely be going with this motion light set-up for the driveway, and M found this for the storage shed. We are super excited about both. I'm also ordering thermal-backed drapes for our bedroom as I expect it will be pretty chilly in there. The master bedroom is downstairs, and the bed will be sitting next to two pretty sizable windows. Hopefully, the thermal drapes will keep us from jacking up the heat. I also had a ceiling fan put in to move the warm air around...and we'll have to get a rug, but that one will wait until next year. We've also had the downstairs painted, and we were able to use no-VOC paint, and we were shocked to learn that the paint only added 70 bucks to the entire bill. Not bad, huh? I can't wait to see the newly painted walls. We've also got great plans to take out the water-hogging, mower-requiring front lawn, but I somehow doubt that major landscaping is in the budget for this spring. We will, however, be putting in a garden and compost bin ASAP, and we'll get a clothesline in pretty soon, too. Hopefully, I'll get some rain barrels before summertime rolls in. I just need to bite the bullet and order some, because really? Do I really see myself running all over creation looking for someone to donate barrels to me...and then rigging up the whole thing? Probably not. I'll keep you updated on that one. I know that anticipation is killing you.

Okay, I've got things to do. I'm out, peeps. Have a great hump day. Here's a lovely picture for you to make you think of warmer spring days...instead of the crappy, ice and snow-filled cold waiting outside right now.

Image from Seaside Landscaping.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

how much junk is in that trunk?

Has anyone else watched Carson Kressley's new show How to Look Good Naked? While I originally took it as pseudo-rip off of my man Tim Gunn's show, I have been converted. I am a believer. While I could never go on a show like that because I could never, ever explain to my granddaddy why I was in my underwear (or naked) on television...that's even if I wanted to plaster my panty-clad butt on television, which I don't...there is one really remarkable thing that they do on this show. And it has nothing to do with naked photo shoots. It has to do with perception. Perception of your own body.

An explanation. Let's say you're on the show, and the thing you hate most about your body is your big butt. They measure your butt. Then they prance a bunch of women out in front of you in their undies and ask you to place yourself between the two women who you think your butt would fit between...you know, less junk in the trunk to the left, more junk in the trunk to your right...it's really a pretty cool thing. Everyone ends up putting themselves between much bigger women than they are. It just shows how hard it is to be objective about your own body. I'd heard of this before...I know that photography is used in therapy for a lot of women with eating disorders. If they see their bodies without their faces, they usually don't recognize themselves, and they can see how thin they really are.

I'd be really interested to see how my own body stacks up, and I think it would be awesome if they could put pictures of lots of women on their website, with their measurements, so real women can get on there and see what they're "up against." It would be nice to see. I do, however, realize that what I'm suggesting could be seen as borderline porn. A whole website with nothing but pictures of girls in their underwear. Maybe not such a good idea in practice. You know, just one of those "good in theory" things.

a little housekeeping

Just a heads up.

I'm going through and adding some tags to my posts. I have recently wasted an egregious amount of time looking for old posts (mostly trying to figure out when S got teeth to write in her baby book), and I've decided that I need to do a little blog-organizing. So, for all of you who get the magic "Ouiser posted" emails and whatnot, you may be getting a lot of them today. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Happy Tuesday.

Oh, in seriously, fabulously interesting news (not really) I just realized that George Clooney's girlfriend is my age. Whoa. That means I've got a shot! Ha. And, don't worry, M won't be upset. George Clooney is the one man on earth that I'm allowed to ditch him for. He can leave me for Jennifer Aniston. Of course, he wavers...sometimes he thinks that the chick from Love Actually is really a better choice for "the one." As for me, it's Clooney, hands down.

I'm out.

Monday, February 25, 2008

home skillet

I just laughed out loud at one line from MSN's Oscar recap. Allow me to share: "This is the Oscars, Home Skillet." It's not even important what the quotation refers to. The important thing is that somewhere out there, someone who gets paid to write actually typed "home skillet." It has cracked me up, and I feel certain that I will start overusing the how-white-are-you phrase immediately. I won't be able to help myself.

Beyond that, not much excitement here. S and I got home yesterday around lunchtime. We were supposed to be home Friday, but the trip was a complete pain in the rear and was dragged out a couple of extra days. I won't even bore you with the details. Besides, I'm not sure my blood pressure can handle a recap. I might blow a gasket.

Now that we're home, packing must resume. I started working more on the kitchen yesterday afternoon, and I hope to get the bathrooms finished up this evening (minus the very bare essentials, of course). S's room is the only room that is virtually untouched, but I have taken all of her pictures off the walls and all of the knick-knacks off the shelves. I haven't even begun to pack her dresser, though, and I am sure it will be one of the last projects I tackle. The guest room is still a disaster, too, and I am trying to decide if there's a way I can just burn it all without doing so much damage that the new owners would notice. Big, smoldering, gaping hole on the front of the house? No problem. That could work.

I'm punchy. Can you tell? Have a great Monday afternoon, peeps. I'm out.

Monday, February 18, 2008

a little love for b.o.

As in Barack Obama...because, really, what else have I been talking about lately?

I ran across this at This Week with Barack Obama:

Hillary Clinton said the following at the Wisconsin Democratic Party dinner:

It will take more than just speeches to fulfill our dreams. It will take a lot of hard work.

Barack Obama said the following in a speech following Clinton's:

Don't tell me words don't matter. If we don't inspire the country to believe again, then it doesn't matter how many policies and plans we have.

While I can't argue with Clinton's assertion that it will, in fact, take a lot of hard work to get this country where it needs to be, I also wholeheartedly believe what Senator Obama said. Words do matter. Some examples of words that have mattered: "I have a dream," "Ask not what your country can do for you," "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall." You know, little words like that. Hope and inspiration are essential. Without them, where are we? What's the point? There was a time when America was just wilderness. It became what it is today because people who had hope were inspired to come here to make their lives better. This country was built on hope and inspiration. How can Hillary Clinton so easily dismiss the power and the importance of them? I think that, especially now, when this nation and this world are in such horrible shape, we need hope more than ever.

I hope that people believe in that message. I hope that America can come together and start getting some things right. I hope that we can create a better world for my daughter because she deserves it, as do all the other children of this country. They deserve better than polluted water and air. They deserve better healthcare. They deserve a good education no matter where they live or how much money their daddies make. They deserve good quality food and toys. They deserve access to music and art and the outdoors. They deserve to be safe from guns and drugs. They deserve it. I want to give it to all of them.

I'm out, peeps. I've got to pack. S and I are headed to Tennessee tomorrow to see Feathernester and family.

Friday, February 15, 2008

more than a feeling

"Classic rock is both classic and it rocks."

That's one of M's favorite lines from any sitcom. Ever. Roz said it on Frasier, and M always takes the opportunity to remind me of it when we battle over adult rock on NPR and his favorite classic rock stations. I always championed the "driver rules" end of things (when I was driving) until we recently started relying on our iPods for road trips, and I just don't think it's safe to play digital DJ while tooling down the interstate at 80mph. What's a girl to do when she wants to listen to Ray LaMontagne and her husband wants to listen to Journey? Listen to Bel Biv Devoe instead. Try it. Works for us. Besides, who can argue about music when you're being reminded to never trust a big butt and a smile?

How do I get off on these tangents? Anyway...

Did anyone else hear that Tom Scholz from the totally awesome 70's supergroup Boston has requested that Mike Huckabee stop using the band's song More than a Feeling? Is that hysterical, or is it just me? He claims that he doesn't support the ideas of Huckabee's campaign and doesn't want him ripping off his hard work to get elected. Besides, he's an Obama man, which makes me love Boston that much more.

The funny thing about it is that I was wondering about something along these lines just the other day. I was wondering whether bands have to approve the use of their music by campaigns. I guess not. Clearly, musicians tend to endorse candidates at some point (think Springsteen for John Kerry), but until that time comes around, is it a free-for-all? Because, I'm not sure if you've noticed, but certain songs always pop up, and I've noticed a recent barrage of U2. I have to wonder how Bono feels about it. And, shouldn't the candidates for president of the United States use a more local band?? Isn't that kind of like making your campaign vehicle a Saab? How unAmerican!! Ha. Anyway, I think that it's funny how music becomes such a huge part of the message.

Okay, since I was apparently berated by the men of Stantec for ignoring "Five Senses Friday" like it didn't exist last week, here you go...

FIVE SENSES FRIDAY
Sight: S walking around with her Valentine's Day balloon

Sound: "Auf Wiedersehen" to Sweet P on this week's Project Runway, the Curious George theme song on PBS

Smell: cheese toast in the oven, chocolate

Touch: S's clean hair...and her warm tummy

Taste: Cranberry Cinnamon Spelt Pancakes, Black Bean and Sweet Potato Soup, Chocolate Cranberry Oatmeal Cookie Bars

I'm out peeps, the chimney sweep should be here any minute.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

it's almost over

I put S to bed tonight without nursing her. She cried for a minute, but then she settled down and went to sleep. As we sat in her chair reading books, I was more than a little sad. I had originally planned to wait until tomorrow night to do this because M is out of town, and I thought this might go easier if he put her to bed for the first few nights. I changed my mind, though. She had skipped her afternoon nap and was seriously tired, so I knew she was really ready to go to sleep.

Tonight. Tomorrow night. It really doesn't matter anyway. Now I'm trying to decide if I'll nurse her in the morning or not. In all honesty, I'm not sure how well nursing once a day, when she wakes up, would even go. I have no idea what would happen to the milk supply, and that's never been an issue I've even remotely had to think about. We'll just have to wait and see. This has happened to fast. I had expected weaning to take a month and a half. It's been three weeks, and I'm all but done. My baby is so not a baby anymore.

Anyway, on to more hysterical S news. After she'd played in her crib for an hour and a half this afternoon, I decided to go get her. She didn't hear me coming up the stairs and she didn't hear me open the door, which provided me with the rare opportunity to just watch her. She was lying on her side with all of her "crib animals" (frog, bear, two ducks, and a pink elephant) and her blanket on top of her, and she was taking her book (because she always lays down for naps with a book) and putting it on top of her head. Then taking it off and looking at it. Then placing it back onto her head. Over and over and over again. I think she was trying to absorb the lessons from What is Love, Biscuit? through osmosis. She finally noticed me when I couldn't contain my laughter. It was great.

Okay, I'm off to make a cup of tea and chill out with the latest Parents magazine. It's another exciting evening at the P household.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

party like a rock star

I just finished watching Barack Obama speak in Madison. You know, that little speech he gave after another clean sweep? Lovely. Anyway, he was speaking to a revved up crowd of about 18,000 who were kept later than expected, but all of whom were still apparently pleased as punch to be there to see the man. 18,000 screaming fans, people. Barack Obama is a rock star. People were chanting.

When Obama was finished, MSNBC switched over to McCain, who was giving his speech after his wins this evening. Talk about a change. Obama spoke to a screaming mob of fans that were packed like sardines into a stadium. There were loads of excited people, young to not-so-young, crowded behind him. Then there was John McCain. One: he was in a hotel ballroom that I assure you did not hold 18,000 people. Two: there wasn't even a twinge of excitement in his voice. Three: the people surrounding him were so old that I think they were probably George Washington's campaign guys. Four: I was so completely bored that I got off the couch and decided to blog about how bored I was with John McCain.

The difference between the two candidates was and is so alarmingly apparent. Alarmingly. Apparent. When faced with a choice between the old curmudgeon and the rock star, who would vote for the old curmudgeon? And why??? Seriously, why? It's old versus new, and I'm not talking about age. I'm talking about ideas. And ideals.

It makes me believe in politics and government again, and I haven't even had a glimmer of that belief since W managed to get into the White House without actually winning the election in any fair sense. I believe in this guy. He makes me want to believe and care again, and it's such a refreshing feeling that I want to tell total strangers about Barack Obama...or just inundate you all with my constant gushing about him.

I'm out, peeps. The pillows are calling my name.

Monday, February 11, 2008

wii're bummed out.

I've had a little cold for a few days. Sore throat, runny nose, achiness. You know the drill. Of course, all of you mamas out there know that a cold isn't a valid excuse for doing nothing, so Friday and Saturday were pretty typical days around here...with a hefty portion of Saturday dedicated to errands and packing up the house for the big move. I was spent on Sunday, and M was nice enough to let me spend most of the day in bed. I'm feeling much better today, but I'm trying to take it easy for the next couple of days in an attempt to let this thing run its course. Good luck, right?

Anyway, some updates...

1. M taught S to say apple yesterday. It's completely hysterical. The puts major emphasis on the "aaaaaa", then there is a little "puhl" that she basically spits out at the end. It's the best.

2. We've eliminated nursing before naps. I went ahead and did both naps last week as I wanted to eliminate confusion ("why did I get mama-milk before my morning nap, but not now?"). It's worked pretty well. We're down to before bed and when she wakes up, and I'm suddenly realizing that nursing really is almost over for me and the munchkin. I'm kind of sad. Liberated, but sad.

3. Despite my cold, I hauled myself out of bed yesterday morning to go to Toys R Us as they were getting Wiis in. As I drove into the parking lot around 9:15 (they were opening at 10), I saw about 100 adults packed like sardines into the vestibule at the front of the store. I turned around and went to Starbucks instead. Then I went home and went back to bed. I've made it a point over the last month to ask every single store that I'm in if they have any in stock. No luck so far, but we're dying to get one. How am I supposed to host "Wii're for Obama" parties without a Wii?

4. Speaking of Obama, it's becoming a mild obsession around here. I keep catching M watching CNN to check out the latest on the campaign, and I'm online pretty much all the time. I actually think I'll try to attend a little Lexington for Obama event this Sunday. I swear I'll write a great post soon to convince all of you to vote for Obama. Just as soon as I get the time...

5. The latest green news around here is pretty exciting, too. We're actually getting ready to make one of our biggest green investments to date (the Hybrid being the largest, clearly). We're going to sell our gas-powered mower and trimmer and get an electric one. We're going to be taking the grass out of our front yard at the new house and planting a native ground cover that won't have to be mowed, and our new backyard is smaller than our yard here, and since I'm planning to make a larger portion of the lawn into my garden, the electric set-up will definitely be able to handle the job. Plus, we won't have to worry about storing gas and oil for the machines, either, which makes us very happy. You can jump on the bandwagon over here.

That's about it around here. I just heard the dryer do off, which means shirts need to be hung up, which also means, "M, you have clean shirts now."

I'm out, peeps. Happy Monday-ing.

Friday, February 08, 2008

the evolution of my vocabulary

I'm not unintelligent. I'm quite proud of my personal lexicon (see how that works) and of the fact that I like words. So, once, years ago when I heard that the only valid occasion for using curse words was when one's vocabulary was insufficient to express one's thoughts, I thought, "$h!t," my vocabulary is going to have to grow. I'm not saying that I've done a great job or that I am so ridiculously intelligent that my vocabulary is always up to snuff. But, I try not to use curse words just because I don't want to think of a better adverb. Or adjective. Or whatever part of speech I need. However, I was quite the potty mouth in college, and I think that had something to do with drinking away my brain cells.

It's changed, though. First, I went to work in Memphis (you know, the recently tornado ravaged River City). While my first real boss was fake British (she was totally southern, but she lived in London for years, so she thought she was very worldly) and cursed quite a bit, the lady who I worked with and loved in the office never cursed. Unless something really, really bad happened. Then she would usually apologize. Then we moved here, and the person that I was closest to at my office here really never cursed. In fact, I don't think K has ever said a bad word in her life. So, those experiences really reigned in my attempts to dethrone sailors.

I will say, however, that I have always been prone to letting a lone curse word fly when injured or cut off in traffic. Now that I've got a baby, I'm seriously trying to quit. And M seriously wants me to quit, which reminds me that I've only ever heard him curse when inebriated (which usually means he's with Mr. Feathernester). I'm working on it, peeps. Working hard. In fact, when I burned myself on a hot pan the other day, dropping an entire pan of cookies face down on the kitchen floor, I said "Oh, ssss-ugar." And when S hit me between the eyes with her drumstick, I said "frick." And on the normal occasions that I want to let a "$h!t" fly, I usually say "boogers." This is what I've become. Erudite Ouiser, reduced to saying "boogers." How hysterical is that?

My biggest problem really is that I don't think of $h!t as a curse word. That's probably because that's what my grandmother always referred to me as, a little $h!t. I mean, if your grandma says it, how bad can it be, right? Anyway, I was just thinking about how far the old vocab has come, and I thought I'd share.

Have a great weekend, peeps, and watch your mouths.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

ashes, ashes, we all fall down

So it's Ash Wednesday and no one in the P family is going to get drawn on at church. Oh, well. Church is a weird situation right now anyway. Neither of the services at church fits into S's schedule, and M and I aren't really pressing the issue as we are about to move, and there is no priest at the church right now, either, which somehow makes it easier to miss. We're heathens.

For the record, we'll be giving up our second home for Lent. Not really. We're not giving it up until the end of Lent, but that's all I've got. I'm already trying to eliminate everything frivolous from our lives for the environment and our health. There isn't much left to cut out. So, I'm giving up a house for Jesus. Surely that's enough. (How blasphemous is this post? I'm probably going straight to H-E-double hockey sticks for being sarcastic about Lent.)

Okay, I'm off to do something productive. Like continue my internet search for the perfect Barack Obama tee shirt. There are some great ones out there like "Barack, Paper, Scissors," "Barack the Vote," or "Have you had your Barack-oli today?", but I haven't found the one that screams, "OUISER!" just yet. And I can't find the really good "My Mama's for Obama" onesie that I found months ago. I'll just have to keep looking. This one may have to do.Happy Hump Day, peeps.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

keeping track

thanks, g.
i have no idea if this will work properly.

milkin' it

We just got home from S's one-year check up. Pretty uneventful...unless you count the shots as events, but I think of them more as traumas than events. I think the word event has too positive a connotation to apply to vaccinations.

She got three shots this time. One in her leg and one in each arm. These were her first shots in her arms, and she did not like it. Who does? I felt bad for her, but she's tough, and she was completely fine 15 seconds later. She's still a monster baby. 24 pounds, six ounces, which lands her in the 89.98th percentile, and she's 31 inches long, which is the 94th percentile. And, she's still a total ham. She was walking around the waiting room, smiling at everyone. I think she was waiting for them all to say how cute she is. I think I'm going to have to stop telling her that she's pretty because I think she's getting a big head.

I did talk to the doctor about the weaning issues and our newest sleep issues, and he made me feel better about both. I seriously love Dr. Childers, and I am bummed that this is the last time we'll likely see him. He's very laid back and practical in his approach to medicine. He recommended that we go ahead and wean her before we move. And he's "not above bribing" a kid to drink milk. He said if she continues to refuse whole milk, put a couple of drops of flavoring in it to get her drinking it, then gradually take it away. But, I realize now that she may be getting enough calcium from yogurt and cheese that I may not need to worry too much. Maybe she can just drink water before bed. She has a cup of water in her bed anyway. We'll figure it out somehow. The good news is that we have successfully eliminated the post-nap nursing sessions altogether. I guess I'll move on to pre-nap feedings this week. Wish me luck.

We also talked about her new sleep routine...she's been ready for bed around six...and ready to start her day at five. This really isn't acceptable. He said we just needed to struggle through a couple of rough nights of keeping her awake until we're ready for her to go to bed...and then make her stay in bed a little longer each morning. He said it would be rough. If we can get her back on track, it's worth it, though. I wake up stressed every morning when she wakes up so early because I know the whole day will be messed up. It sucks. So, I guess we'll be trying this out, too. Besides, I need to get her bedtime back to something seemingly normal before we move as we'll be headed back to central time (thank God!), and her current routine would have her waking up at 4am there. Holy moly.

Lastly, in case anyone is interested, I did ask him how he felt about BPAs in plastic cups (as S threw her eighteen pound Foogo weapon, I mean cup, at him). He said that the concern is so negligible that it's not really a problem. There are a lot of other concerns that are more pressing. I even asked him if I needed to be hand-washing all of her plastic cups. He said, "if you've got time, great. If not, don't worry about it." It was good to hear. I hate the Born Free cups because they leak everywhere, and the Foogo cups are bound to cause Otis brain damage if he continues to be hit in the head with them...or I'll end up with a broken bone from them. It's just a matter of time. So, I'll continue to use the Playtex sippy cups that never leak and that don't frighten my metatarpals. When she gets older, I'll get her a Kleen Kanteen or a Sigg, but for now, I'm crossing this off my "to-stress about" list. That way, I can get back to stressing about more important things. Like what kinds of tomatoes I want to grow in the garden this year.

Enjoy Fat Tuesday. And, if you're in a state that's voting today, get off your butt and show your love for a democrat.

Monday, February 04, 2008

things i learned from the super bowl

So, last night's Super Bowl was a pretty great Super Bowl, huh? I realize that my Patriot-loving readers might not agree, but my Giant-loving readers are on cloud nine today. I'm not exactly unbiased as I was rooting for the littlest Manning, but it really was an exciting football game. The Patriots know how to make a Super Bowl come down to the wire. These are the things that I learned from yesterday's festivities:

1. Tom Brady is not unbeatable. Unless you're talking about a contest for single best-looking quarterback ever. He wins that one. Hands down.

2. SalesGenie.com is not afraid of alienating huge segments of the population with their culturally-insensitive commercials.

3. Troy Aikman could strangle me with one hand without a problem. The man probably has the largest hands in America. They are almost cartoonish.

4. Joe Buck's hair is not real. It can't possibly be real.

5. Ryan Seacrest played high school football in Georgia. That, like Joe Buck's hair, doesn't seem possible.

6. The Manning family has wicked awesome genes.

7. There are Hybrid Cadillac Escalades and a Hybrid GMC Yukons. While I am happy that both of these vehicles exist, there are issues. Like, who could possible afford these behemoths, and, seriously, BUY SOMETHING A LITTLE SMALLER. Please. Unless you are toting around a minimum of three kids you don't need a vehicle that large. Even then I have issues.

8. Some people should save their money and not make Super Bowl commercials.

I think that's all. It's at least all I can remember. Happy Day-after the Super Bowl...day before Super Tuesday and Fat Tuesday. All that. I'm out.